Thursday, December 27, 2007♥12/27/2007 10:07:00 PM
My brain is suffocating, it's dying for a breathe.
I need a channel to vent out my frustration, my anger and my stress! They're overloading my tiny brain and intruding me!!!!!
I NEED A BREAK~! from everything.....
Be it in relationship, in career, in future, I'm totally lost.....
I hurt someone just because I don't understand myself. He's treating me the best among all, I swear noone could treat me better than he does yet I don't cherish our relationship. I tarnish his love for me.
Ya, you can scold me or say I'm stupid.
In fact, I'm foolish. Someone please knock on my head or just struggle me to death, please please~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I'm really really really sorry..................
I lost one artery forcep this morning while I was scrubbed up for a wound debridement and exploration of left thigh. Only two artery forceps were taken out of my instrument tray when I was preparing for the case.
I did count my instrument pre-operatively and of course final count, too. However, after the application of Vac dressing, weird thing happened. It happened when I was clearing instruments then I found out one artery forcep was no where to be found~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Thus, we searched the whole theatre, tumbled all the rubbish bins, linens, slouise room, biohazard bag..........Still, no sign of it!!!
So, in order to play safe ( knowingly an artery forcep could never be able to fit into patient's thigh), X-ray was conducted by surgeon. Guess..? WE COULDN'T FIND IT ALSO~!!!!!!!!
Oh god, please kill me!!!!! All of us was exhausted after working 24 hours continuously, it got worst to search for the stupid artery forcep.
Left with no chioce, e-Hor was raised.
Fuck.
I'm trying my very best to do everything correctly yet thing still happens. My record of losing instrument would affect my performance and worse still I couldn't rest my brain in peace.
I'm worried.
I'm considering of taking up a bachelor of science of University of Sunderland in Singapore. It's actually a Bachelor (hons) of science with part-time 2 years course.
The big issue is my financial problem- $17,000 for the whole course. I know it doesn't sound much for some people, but for the poor like me, it's problem. Especially I have to pay for everything while I'm repaying a NYP loan with bank too.
Although it provides educational loan, still, it hinders me from proceeding.
Anyway, tomorrow I'll be visiting their falculty. All the best to me.
*extra information to my friends who is planning for degree courses:
University of Sunderland is based in UK, collaborate with Harriet Group in Singapore Course fee: $17,000. Full-time for 1 year, part-time for 2 years. Two sessions available in a day. Accredicted by SNB and MOE. Most importantly, it's a honours bachelor of nursing while Griffith, La Throbe, Sydney and Curtin only offer ordinary degree.
Somebody kills me please.
Totally engrossed,
Scribbled by Valerie, pen down at
12/27/2007 10:07:00 PM
